I recently was accepted into the Master Coach Training program with my mentor Martha Beck. I am pumped and scared to death. I will be stepping out of my comfort zone to train with a group of people that I’ve convinced myself are much more qualified than I am.
As part of the application process, I had to share and analyze a limiting belief I have as it related to this training. I didn’t hesitate. My limited belief was “I am not good enough.”
Although it felt very true to me, I also had a good laugh at myself. I’ve coached so many clients about this exact same belief and there I sat, knowing better, and yet, feeling it anyway.
In our life coach training, we are taught “The Work” by Byron Katie. Byron Katie is an incredible spiritual teacher and an advocate for the truth. Byron Katie believes that “it’s not reality that makes us suffer. It’s our thoughts about reality.” If you’re curious about her work, I encourage you to check out her site www.byronkatie.com or pick up her book Loving What Is. Or better yet, watch her in action https://www.youtube.com/user/TheWorkofBK.
I’m not going to take you through the full process but, the idea behind it is to question whether something is true. To examine how you feel when you believe that thought. To imagine what it would feel like not to believe it. And, to find evidence to the contrary. I love this process and it works time and again. I’m sharing it with you because I imagine we all feel not good enough often enough.
When I asked myself if it was true, I knew deep down that it wasn’t. Fear rears its ugly head and wants to keep me small.
When I believed I wasn’t good enough, my shoulder hunched over, my posture was poor and I felt self-conscious about what I had to say. I held back.
When I dropped the thought and didn’t believe it, I showed up as I was – imperfections and all. I stood tall, I smiled, I laughed and I shared my thoughts. I felt open to the experience and open to the fact that I don’t know everything and have lots to learn.
I would then need to go digging for evidence to the contrary. What evidence was there to support that I WAS good enough? Well, I had the hours I needed to apply for the program. I’d launched a robust coaching practice. I have a regular roster of clients – all of whom I love working with. I even had a client e-mail me Christmas morning to tell me what an impact I’d had on the decisions she’d made that year.
And – deep down – I could feel something even a little richer … sometimes enough is enough. Enough isn’t empty or lacking. It’s showing up as you are today. I have a wealth of experience to share with my fellow students and they will have experience to share that is completely different. It’s being willing to step outside my comfort zone and be there. It’s showing up as me and loving the experience. It’s learning and transforming. Forever.
When clients come to me with the same belief that they aren’t good enough, I walk them through a similar exercise. I coax a lot of evidence out of them to demonstrate just how awesome they are. And – they are all very awesome. And – so are you. For those days when you’re feeling like you aren’t good enough, ground your feet, stand up tall and say to yourself I AM good enough. Feel what your body does when you say that. Find the evidence in your life that more the adequately demonstrates just how capable and incredible you are.
You are good enough. You can do this. Go out there & give it your very best try! You will be so glad you did.